While everyone may think they know what she looks like, they don’t. She changes her appearance depending on who she’s with, and she’s great at camouflaging herself.
She’s very quiet and dim, which allows her to hide behind the loudest laughs, and brightest smiles; but she is also strong and not to be underestimated.
She’s clingy, and suffocating, and often brings her live-in best friend, Anxiety. He’s a real dick too. He hangs around everyone’s house without their permission. I mean literally everyone; to the point where if you tell someone he’s been around, they don’t take you seriously, because everyone has had him in some shape or form. In his eyes, everyone is an enemy, and no one is good enough, and you’re also the bad guy. He also has this creepy habit of collecting hair, sometimes fat, or energy. Sometimes he gives you more weight gain than you’d like. Also, he has this insane attention to detail, so there’s not a crows foot or stretch mark, or nose hair that won’t go unnoticed. Don’t ever tell him your plans, he’ll make you second guess yourself and you’ll quit on the spot or in the middle of a project. Insecurity is his middle name.
No one takes either of them seriously. At least until Depression takes a life. If everyone really wanted to take her seriously, they’d lock her up and give her a death sentence. She comes around, and sticks with you—sometimes for days—for years, and then one day, you end it all. Your family and friends had no idea. Some people thought she was just a phase. Then, everyone is up in arms about how unhealthy she is, and how our communities need to be proactive. But after about a month or so, everyone goes back to their daily lives as if nothing happened. Then she moves in with them. Most people don’t even notice she’s there, until they notice that they’re not in control. They may think that they’re on “autopilot,” but really, it’s just Depression taking over the home, the appetite, the bills, the job, the relationship.
Then one day, you find that people closest to you have had frequent visits from her as well. You all get together one day to support each other in the fight against Depression. You talk, and it helps. Others meditate; which may not be your style. The great news is, there’s no wrong way to do it. We think this battle is in the arena, and that we have to slay this dragon. In reality, we can leave that battle at any time, and leave that dragon in the arena, and into the arms of the people around you. There is no shame, no guilt, and, more importantly, a community of love. Depression won’t always be out of the picture completely, but you feel better knowing that you have a community of fighters around you.
I wrote this corny “analogy” while at my desk at work. As you can tell, this has been my first post since April. It’s one thing to feel depressed. It’s a completely different experience to succumb to it. The latest news of the suicide deaths of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain had obviously been a portion of the driving force behind my thoughts. What I didn’t realize was that I needed to write this out for myself. I am very new to the lifestyle of “mental wellness fitness.” If I could compare it to anything, it’s like if you hadn’t been to the gym in months and find it harder to get back in shape. Obviously, practicing mental wellness is a lot more serious than that, but it is very similar. We exercise to keep our bodies strong and healthy. We ought to do the same with our minds.
Feed your mind with information and affirmations.
Some resources you may enjoy:
I tune in weekly to the Married Millennials Podcast on iTunes.
In June 12th’s episode entitled “Leading with Compassion,” married couple Justin and Joy open up about their journeys with mental wellness. You can listen to their podcast on their website: LoveJays.com
They also have a weekly wellness news letter that is managed by Joy, in which she shares books, words of wisdom, and some mental/physical/financial wellness challenges of the week.
I have also invested in a pack of Affirmators! thanks to a good friend and coworker. Each pack has 50 Affirmation cards that act almost as a daily meditation. I have the original pack, but they also have packs for love and relationships, for work, and even a journal. You can purchase a pack on Amazon.
My challenge to you is to make a practice out of what helps you. Do it every day, even if it’s just for five minutes. Meditate, take a stroll through the park, write, read, or whatever you love to do. Mental wellness is a practice, and it is done every day.
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